As many of you know, I love my blog. I love the community it links me to. I love that friends and family can read about Daniella, Brady, Dean, Troy, Thom and I whenever they feel the need for a little "Stambaugh time".
But lately, blogs have been breaking my heart. On Friday, I ran across a blog in which the 8 month old baby boy, Sage, who died of SIDS. Not only did this cause me to sob like I had just lost my own child, but have two anxiety attacks (one of which I needed to be medicated). I have not been able to get this family out of my head since. On Sunday at church I lifted this family up to Christ our King once more and prayed for peace for the mother and father of this little boy. I am heart broken for this family. I will not add the link to this family's webpage as I do not want any of my readers to have to go through the same heart break from seeing these pictures.
I also have been reading another blog about a sick little boy. MckMama is a very famous blogger who has blog-named each of her kids after a McDonald's food (it sounds silly, but it's really cute). He youngest baby, little boy Stellan (aka McMuffin), was born with an enlarged heart. Stellan is only 5 months old and is having some serious health issues which has landed them in the hospital. Thankfully, due to the popularity of MckMama's blog, a lot of people are praying for little Stellan.
After reading these blogs, I have been having a hard time letting go of Troy. My heart is broken and my anxiety levels are at an all time high. For the past couple nights I have a hard time putting Troy to bed and kissing Dean as though something might happen. I know this is very unreasonable, however as a mother with high anxiety, unreasonable thoughts are all I have.
I am not writing this entry for pity. I am just asking you to life up Sage's family and Stellan's family and doctors. Please keep them in your prayers as they need all the prayers they can get right now.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Saturday, March 28, 2009
6 Months
6 months of sleepless nights
6 months of poopy diapers
6 months of spit up
6 months of doctor visits
6 months of day care bills
6 months of exhaustion
(his face is so red because he's sick)
6 months of smiles
6 months of giggles
6 months of soft baby skin
6 months of playtime
6 months of learning new things
6 months of loving siblings
6 months of tickles
6 months of pure joy
6 months of poopy diapers
6 months of spit up
6 months of doctor visits
6 months of day care bills
6 months of exhaustion
(his face is so red because he's sick)6 months of smiles
6 months of giggles
6 months of soft baby skin
6 months of playtime
6 months of learning new things
6 months of loving siblings
6 months of tickles
6 months of pure joy
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Shelleyology
Okay, I love these dumb survey things....
***********FOODOLOGY******What is your salad dressing of choice? Ranch
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant? Carrabas
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of? Pasta
What are your pizza toppings of choice? Ham, onions and extra cheese
What do you like to put on your toast? Butter (however, I don't like the texture of toast - so it's untoasted for me)
***********TECHNOLOGY***************
How many televisions are in your house? 4
What color is your cell phone? Pink
Do you have an Ipod? Yup
***************BIOLOGY******************
Are you right-handed or left-handed? right
Have you ever had anything removed from your body? A baby :)
What is the last heavy item you lifted? Suitcase
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? In 7th grade with a basketball that was punted across the gym. Hit me square on the top of the head and I passed out.
************BULLCRAPOLOGY**************
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? NO!
If you could change your name, what would you change it to? Sorry, not something I ever thought about. Probably something cool like "Supreme Master of the Universe"
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for 1000 dollars? Hell yeah!
************DUMBOLOGY******************
How many pairs of flip flops do you own? 3 or 4
Last time you had a run-in with the cops? Sorry, don't remember.
Last person you talked to? Dean
Last person you hugged? Troy
**************FAVORITOLOGY****************
Season? Summer - it stays light late, baseball games, playing outside
Holiday? Christmas
Day of the week? Saturday
Month? December
***********CURRENTOLOGY*****************
Missing someone? I want my hubby to come back from dropping of his kids
Mood? Dandy
What are you listening to? Cartoons in the other room
Watching? Words pop up on my computer monitor as I type
Worrying about? Family
***************RANDOMOLOGY*****************
First place you went this morning? To get the rental car
What's the last movie you saw? I don't remember the name but something crazy my dad picked out
Do you smile often? More often lately than I have in years past
Sleeping Alone Tonight? Nope :)
***************OTHER-OLOGY*****************
Do you always answer your phone? No
Its four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it? A wrong number. No one I know is up that late.
If you could change your eye color what would it be? A beautiful, bright green. No more of this gross hazel crap
What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic? Sorry, there are no Sonics up here. And since I've lived in the same 10 mile radius my whole live, I wouldn't know. But I do find it irritating that they advertise them on our local tv networks.
Do you own a digital camera? A few
Have you ever had a pet fish? Yup, my ex and I had 2 oscars, mine was Bob Dole and his was Jimmy Dean
Favorite Christmas song(s)? Oh I HATE Christmas songs!!! Don't EVEN get me started!!
What's on your wish list for your birthday? Something expensive
Does the future make you excited or nervous? excited
Can you do push ups? nope
Can you do a chin ups? absolutely not
Do you have any saved text? huh? Like on a phone... or like on a computer? What?
Ever been in a car wreck? No, but once my boyfriend rolled a car but we were fine
Do you have an accent? People in England think I do
What is the last song to make you cry? Don't know
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? oh yeah
Name 3 things you bought yesterday... Corn Starch, lemon, jelly
Have you ever been given roses? Yes, my hubby is WONDERFUL
Current worry? Job security
Current hate right now? economy
Met someone who changed your life? My husband
Have you ever dated someone longer than a year? Yep, I'm a long-termer
Do you have any tattoos/piercings? Yep.
Will you be in a relationship 4 months from now? Hope so, I'm married
Does anyone love you? snort. How stupid is this?
Do you like to cuddle? NO. I have a BUBBLE!
Have you held hands with anyone today? No
Who was the last person you took a picture of? Troy
***********FOODOLOGY******
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant? Carrabas
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of? Pasta
What are your pizza toppings of choice? Ham, onions and extra cheese
What do you like to put on your toast? Butter (however, I don't like the texture of toast - so it's untoasted for me)
***********TECHNOLOGY*****
How many televisions are in your house? 4
What color is your cell phone? Pink
Do you have an Ipod? Yup
***************BIOLOGY****
Are you right-handed or left-handed? right
Have you ever had anything removed from your body? A baby :)
What is the last heavy item you lifted? Suitcase
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? In 7th grade with a basketball that was punted across the gym. Hit me square on the top of the head and I passed out.
************BULLCRAPOLOGY*
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? NO!
If you could change your name, what would you change it to? Sorry, not something I ever thought about. Probably something cool like "Supreme Master of the Universe"
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for 1000 dollars? Hell yeah!
************DUMBOLOGY*****
How many pairs of flip flops do you own? 3 or 4
Last time you had a run-in with the cops? Sorry, don't remember.
Last person you talked to? Dean
Last person you hugged? Troy
**************FAVORITOLOGY
Season? Summer - it stays light late, baseball games, playing outside
Holiday? Christmas
Day of the week? Saturday
Month? December
***********CURRENTOLOGY***
Missing someone? I want my hubby to come back from dropping of his kids
Mood? Dandy
What are you listening to? Cartoons in the other room
Watching? Words pop up on my computer monitor as I type
Worrying about? Family
***************RANDOMOLOGY
First place you went this morning? To get the rental car
What's the last movie you saw? I don't remember the name but something crazy my dad picked out
Do you smile often? More often lately than I have in years past
Sleeping Alone Tonight? Nope :)
***************OTHER-OLOGY
Do you always answer your phone? No
Its four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it? A wrong number. No one I know is up that late.
If you could change your eye color what would it be? A beautiful, bright green. No more of this gross hazel crap
What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic? Sorry, there are no Sonics up here. And since I've lived in the same 10 mile radius my whole live, I wouldn't know. But I do find it irritating that they advertise them on our local tv networks.
Do you own a digital camera? A few
Have you ever had a pet fish? Yup, my ex and I had 2 oscars, mine was Bob Dole and his was Jimmy Dean
Favorite Christmas song(s)? Oh I HATE Christmas songs!!! Don't EVEN get me started!!
What's on your wish list for your birthday? Something expensive
Does the future make you excited or nervous? excited
Can you do push ups? nope
Can you do a chin ups? absolutely not
Do you have any saved text? huh? Like on a phone... or like on a computer? What?
Ever been in a car wreck? No, but once my boyfriend rolled a car but we were fine
Do you have an accent? People in England think I do
What is the last song to make you cry? Don't know
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? oh yeah
Name 3 things you bought yesterday... Corn Starch, lemon, jelly
Have you ever been given roses? Yes, my hubby is WONDERFUL
Current worry? Job security
Current hate right now? economy
Met someone who changed your life? My husband
Have you ever dated someone longer than a year? Yep, I'm a long-termer
Do you have any tattoos/piercings? Yep.
Will you be in a relationship 4 months from now? Hope so, I'm married
Does anyone love you? snort. How stupid is this?
Do you like to cuddle? NO. I have a BUBBLE!
Have you held hands with anyone today? No
Who was the last person you took a picture of? Troy
Friday, March 20, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Dean Speak Vol. 6
Dean: "Mom, when I grow up I want to have identical twins. But you won't be able to tell them apart, so I will take a permanent marker and put a number 1 on one of their foreheads and a number 2 on the other one's."
Mom: "Will you call them Thing 1 and Thing 2?"
Dean: "No Mom! I will call them Bob 1 and Bob 2!"
Mom: "Huh?"
Mom: "Will you call them Thing 1 and Thing 2?"
Dean: "No Mom! I will call them Bob 1 and Bob 2!"
Mom: "Huh?"
Monday, March 16, 2009
The Sound of Sound
As many of you know, I have made many friends in the Deaf and Hard of Hearing world already. One of my friends just went through the surgery part of a cochlear implant with her daughter, "Little M". Little M's mom found this article one day and posted it on her blog. I have copied it below because it is such an amazing article about what happens after the cochlear implant is implanted.
I hope you enjoy as much as I did...
I hope you enjoy as much as I did...
The Sound of Sound
Written By Jennifer Rosner
What it's like to be a little girl with a cochlear implant. What it's like to be her mom.
For my 4-year-old daughter Juliet, hearing is optional. She was born profoundly deaf. Juliet has a cochlear implant, which brings her access to sound, so long as she wears her external processor — a behind-the-ear device that looks like a hearing aid with a small magnetic disk that attaches to the implant in her head. Throughout each preschool day, Juliet wears her processor, and with it she hears. And she talks. She hums. She sings. Juliet's language and music are wonders to behold. But when she arrives home from school exhausted, she often wants to take her processor off.
"I don't want my sound," she says, and she piles the mound of earmold, wire, and magnet into my open palm.
Written By Jennifer Rosner
What it's like to be a little girl with a cochlear implant. What it's like to be her mom.
For my 4-year-old daughter Juliet, hearing is optional. She was born profoundly deaf. Juliet has a cochlear implant, which brings her access to sound, so long as she wears her external processor — a behind-the-ear device that looks like a hearing aid with a small magnetic disk that attaches to the implant in her head. Throughout each preschool day, Juliet wears her processor, and with it she hears. And she talks. She hums. She sings. Juliet's language and music are wonders to behold. But when she arrives home from school exhausted, she often wants to take her processor off.
"I don't want my sound," she says, and she piles the mound of earmold, wire, and magnet into my open palm.
If a restaurant is too loud and Juliet is tired — yank — I have to rush to catch this several-thousand-dollar "ear" before she sets it down on a table smeared with ketchup or blue cheese dressing. Just as quickly, I race to settle Juliet into a comfortable position because, with the blessing of quiet and the shut of her eyes, she falls asleep in seconds. On weekend mornings, Juliet asks to wait before putting on her processor. She enjoys puttering around the house in silence, tuning us out, ignoring our demands. When she wants us, she just stands in place and yells (she has no idea how loudly) until we show ourselves in her visual field. Juliet signs, and we sign back, yet she often chooses not to reason with us when her sound is out. Sometimes she won't even look our way, disabling our speaking voices and our signing hands. To be sure, Juliet can be ornery with or without her sound. But without it, her face takes on so much expression that her glower can send us packing.
Juliet rips her processor off at the sight of the blender or the vacuum cleaner. She puts it back on when she spies a book I could read to her or a video she wants to watch. Like a baseball cap: off for the bath, on for the playdate, off to run through the sprinkler, then back on for the cupcakes. I wonder sometimes whether to encourage this. But why should she hear the babies crying at the pediatrician's office if she doesn't have to? Why not miss the jackhammer blast when the car is stuck in traffic? Juliet senses everything that's happening through vibrations anyway. Whether her sound is on or off, she knows when someone walks into the room, and she can read a face like a book. As she reminds me with a scowl when I repeat in sign what I've said aloud: "I know what you just said."
It's impossible for me to know what Juliet's experiences are like, with sound or without it. When I first heard a simulation of how a voice sounds through a cochlear implant, I was horrified. It sounded like Darth Vader speaking through Demi Moore as she imitated the Wicked Witch of the West. "We're going to drill into her tiny skull for this?" I asked the Boston Children's Hospital cochlear implant team. Can I never expect her to hear the timbre of my voice, or to distinguish between voices? And what will her voice sound like? I was placated, ultimately, by the sight (and sound!) of other implanted children at the playground of a nearby school for the deaf.
Juliet's cochlear implant surgery took place on her first birthday, and it lasted five hours. A few weeks after, her sound was "turned on" — the external processor was programmed and activated. It was set at a low volume, so as not to scare her, and it came with extra settings that grew gradually louder.
We were warned that most implanted babies cry when they hear sound for the first time. I wrapped my arms around Juliet as the audiologist attached the processor — glop — and the external magnet glommed onto Juliet's head like a magnet onto a refrigerator. Instructing us to be quiet, the audiologist handed Juliet a drum and a stick. Juliet whacked the drum, then jumped back like a startled animal at the sound of the boom. She searched our faces with wide questioning eyes. She beat the drum again. And then Juliet thrust back her head and laughed.
For the next hour, she used the drumstick to beat other things: the audiologist's pant leg made almost no sound, the metal file cabinet made a loud clanging boom, the tone of the wood chair was different than the thicker wood table. Juliet had become a scientist, studying and experimenting with sound.
According to the audiologist, all sounds would come in as beeps and blips at first. It would be months before the neural pathways between Juliet's auditory nerve and her brain would be forged and able to translate the input into meaningful sound. That is, it would be months before "moo" could be distinguished from "quack" and pinned on its rightful farm speaker. And months before Juliet would turn at my calling of her name. In the meantime, we would put in a lot of "moos" and "quacks." We would point out and comment on nearly every sound that could be heard in our home: the sizzling of an egg in the skillet, the full rush then drip drip of water from the faucet, the stray cock-a-doodle-doo of a neighbor's rooster, the metallic scritch of a zipper running up a coat. "I hear it," I'd say, pointing to my ear, as the phone rang, or the heat kicked in.
The flop of a pancake. The shake of the milk bottle. The sound of the birds as we walked outside. The click of the car seat buckle before we drove. The clank of carts and the thunk of grapefruits as we shopped. Every sound: listened for, acknowledged, remarked upon.
Each morning, I'd put on Juliet's implant processor. I'd also stick a hearing aid into her nonimplanted ear. I was used to hearing aids. Juliet's older sister, Sophia, has a lesser hearing impairment, and hearing aids enable Sophia to hear and speak. Juliet objected to her aid, but I persisted. Set at its highest volume, it might give her access to new sounds.
Then, to keep things cheery, I'd chase her around the house. One snowy day in February, when Juliet was 1 1/2, we were running round and round. "I'm going to get you, Juliet," I yelled, offering her the lead, then trailing in the sea of squeals and laughter that floated in from the room ahead. At one point the tea kettle whistled and I broke the chase for a quick hearing lesson. I stood still in the kitchen until Juliet knocked into me, and as she caught her breath I pointed out the high-pitched whistle, thick steam shooting up at the kitchen cabinets. "I hear it," I said, pointing to my ears. Then I switched off the stove and resumed the chase.
Time out had to be called several times because Juliet's processor magnet slipped off, dragged down by the weight of her controller, which flapped in a pocket I had hastily sewn onto her T-shirt. Juliet took the time-outs like a puppy halted mid-nip to scratch an itch. Her hair came loose from her topknot. Her eyes sparkled. At one point, as I gained on her, sock-skating into the dining room, I called out, "Juliet!" and she turned her head to look at me.
I stopped in my tracks like Road Runner.
"Juliet?" I ventured again. By now she was smiling a huge smile — she had heard and recognized her name.
"Juliet," I choked, and I scooped her into my arms, "I got you, Juliet. I got you. I've gotten you."
Juliet rips her processor off at the sight of the blender or the vacuum cleaner. She puts it back on when she spies a book I could read to her or a video she wants to watch. Like a baseball cap: off for the bath, on for the playdate, off to run through the sprinkler, then back on for the cupcakes. I wonder sometimes whether to encourage this. But why should she hear the babies crying at the pediatrician's office if she doesn't have to? Why not miss the jackhammer blast when the car is stuck in traffic? Juliet senses everything that's happening through vibrations anyway. Whether her sound is on or off, she knows when someone walks into the room, and she can read a face like a book. As she reminds me with a scowl when I repeat in sign what I've said aloud: "I know what you just said."
It's impossible for me to know what Juliet's experiences are like, with sound or without it. When I first heard a simulation of how a voice sounds through a cochlear implant, I was horrified. It sounded like Darth Vader speaking through Demi Moore as she imitated the Wicked Witch of the West. "We're going to drill into her tiny skull for this?" I asked the Boston Children's Hospital cochlear implant team. Can I never expect her to hear the timbre of my voice, or to distinguish between voices? And what will her voice sound like? I was placated, ultimately, by the sight (and sound!) of other implanted children at the playground of a nearby school for the deaf.
Juliet's cochlear implant surgery took place on her first birthday, and it lasted five hours. A few weeks after, her sound was "turned on" — the external processor was programmed and activated. It was set at a low volume, so as not to scare her, and it came with extra settings that grew gradually louder.
We were warned that most implanted babies cry when they hear sound for the first time. I wrapped my arms around Juliet as the audiologist attached the processor — glop — and the external magnet glommed onto Juliet's head like a magnet onto a refrigerator. Instructing us to be quiet, the audiologist handed Juliet a drum and a stick. Juliet whacked the drum, then jumped back like a startled animal at the sound of the boom. She searched our faces with wide questioning eyes. She beat the drum again. And then Juliet thrust back her head and laughed.
For the next hour, she used the drumstick to beat other things: the audiologist's pant leg made almost no sound, the metal file cabinet made a loud clanging boom, the tone of the wood chair was different than the thicker wood table. Juliet had become a scientist, studying and experimenting with sound.
According to the audiologist, all sounds would come in as beeps and blips at first. It would be months before the neural pathways between Juliet's auditory nerve and her brain would be forged and able to translate the input into meaningful sound. That is, it would be months before "moo" could be distinguished from "quack" and pinned on its rightful farm speaker. And months before Juliet would turn at my calling of her name. In the meantime, we would put in a lot of "moos" and "quacks." We would point out and comment on nearly every sound that could be heard in our home: the sizzling of an egg in the skillet, the full rush then drip drip of water from the faucet, the stray cock-a-doodle-doo of a neighbor's rooster, the metallic scritch of a zipper running up a coat. "I hear it," I'd say, pointing to my ear, as the phone rang, or the heat kicked in.
The flop of a pancake. The shake of the milk bottle. The sound of the birds as we walked outside. The click of the car seat buckle before we drove. The clank of carts and the thunk of grapefruits as we shopped. Every sound: listened for, acknowledged, remarked upon.
Each morning, I'd put on Juliet's implant processor. I'd also stick a hearing aid into her nonimplanted ear. I was used to hearing aids. Juliet's older sister, Sophia, has a lesser hearing impairment, and hearing aids enable Sophia to hear and speak. Juliet objected to her aid, but I persisted. Set at its highest volume, it might give her access to new sounds.
Then, to keep things cheery, I'd chase her around the house. One snowy day in February, when Juliet was 1 1/2, we were running round and round. "I'm going to get you, Juliet," I yelled, offering her the lead, then trailing in the sea of squeals and laughter that floated in from the room ahead. At one point the tea kettle whistled and I broke the chase for a quick hearing lesson. I stood still in the kitchen until Juliet knocked into me, and as she caught her breath I pointed out the high-pitched whistle, thick steam shooting up at the kitchen cabinets. "I hear it," I said, pointing to my ears. Then I switched off the stove and resumed the chase.
Time out had to be called several times because Juliet's processor magnet slipped off, dragged down by the weight of her controller, which flapped in a pocket I had hastily sewn onto her T-shirt. Juliet took the time-outs like a puppy halted mid-nip to scratch an itch. Her hair came loose from her topknot. Her eyes sparkled. At one point, as I gained on her, sock-skating into the dining room, I called out, "Juliet!" and she turned her head to look at me.
I stopped in my tracks like Road Runner.
"Juliet?" I ventured again. By now she was smiling a huge smile — she had heard and recognized her name.
"Juliet," I choked, and I scooped her into my arms, "I got you, Juliet. I got you. I've gotten you."
Dinner Time!
Last week I finally broke down and bought Troy a baby seat for the kitchen table. I decided it was time to start baby food and it was just too hard to feed him as he flopped around in his bouncy seat. It was so cute the first time, I left the camera on the table and just kept taking pics all week...
Our first dinner with Troy at the table with us!
Troy's first bite of baby food - applesauce!
Troy's reaction to his first bite of applesauce..."Hmmm, what is this stuff?"
Dean showing Troy how to properly eat carrots
Troy was not a big fan of the carrots. He proceeded to spit them out for the rest of the night. We have two burb rags and 1 baby outfit stained orange.
Troy not paying attention to his mommy as she tries to feed him. Oh no...the dog is WAY more interesting!
This is some GOOD stuff!
Our first dinner with Troy at the table with us!
Troy's first bite of baby food - applesauce!
Troy's reaction to his first bite of applesauce..."Hmmm, what is this stuff?"
Dean showing Troy how to properly eat carrots
Troy was not a big fan of the carrots. He proceeded to spit them out for the rest of the night. We have two burb rags and 1 baby outfit stained orange.
Troy not paying attention to his mommy as she tries to feed him. Oh no...the dog is WAY more interesting!
This is some GOOD stuff!Friday, March 13, 2009
Meeup Baby Carrier
I just ordered my Meeup Baby Carrier (I ordered Gossip Tree Sky).
I can't wait to get it and WEAR my baby boy!
I will take pictures when I get it and figure it out!
(the picture above is from the website - no I did not suddenly get really skinny and chop my hair off)
Happy baby wearing to all!
I can't wait to get it and WEAR my baby boy!
I will take pictures when I get it and figure it out!
(the picture above is from the website - no I did not suddenly get really skinny and chop my hair off)
Happy baby wearing to all!
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Picture Time
After climbing on the back of our couch to the window behind him, Dean decided to jump onto the couch. The camera caught him in action.
Great pic of Troy!
Chewing on Mommy's knee
Cuddling with Daddy
Not so sure about what's going on
Chilling with Mommy while she checks her blog :)
Talking with Daddy
Nana thought Troy should ride Dean like a horse
Trying to sit up!
Almost there!
Friday, March 6, 2009
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Monday, March 2, 2009
Anonymous Comments
Thanks to Melissa for giving me this idea (I had no idea this could be done).
Today, I decide to enable anonymous comments on our blog. I realized that we have some family members who enjoy reading about our lives here, but are unable to say hello because of the way we had things set up. Now, instead of feeling like you are "looking in through our windows" (by the way, this is how I want you to feel - just not in the peeping Tom way), you can click on the comments button below and tell us how much you love us and miss us! :)
Today, I decide to enable anonymous comments on our blog. I realized that we have some family members who enjoy reading about our lives here, but are unable to say hello because of the way we had things set up. Now, instead of feeling like you are "looking in through our windows" (by the way, this is how I want you to feel - just not in the peeping Tom way), you can click on the comments button below and tell us how much you love us and miss us! :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)